Life on Standby

"I don't think people are meant to be by themselves, that's why, if you actually find someone you care about... it's important to let go of the little things - even if you can't let go all the way. Because nothing sucks more than feeling all alone... no matter how many people are around you"

Thursday, June 01, 2006

Is it any wonder?

So, no blogging for a while... whats that all about??

Firstly, to be bluntly honest... I couldn't be bothered. I have no idea if anybody other than myself reads the bland mundane drivel I was writing - always down, always putting myself down. New start with my blog methinks - to go with the new start I am making in my personal and professional life, I have a new vigour for something, I have no idea what or why... A couple of things have fell good for me lately and it's awakened a little bit of the old bsg, the ORIGIONAL bsg. Going to start using my camera again, it's about time I gave this blog a kick up it's depressing arse!



Finally got around to some redecorating - I was soooooooo pissed off with living in a shit hole. I have finished my sitting room and I like the way it looks. I want a tropical fish tank to go on my feature wall (check out the gheyness!! I've even been calling the colours by their corect names... Volcanic Splash, Labrador Sands, Viennese Truffle... wtf?!?) and a small beech coloured table for the middle of the room, got the picture in my head, table, floating scented candle bowl?!?




Been to see environmental health about the water damage to my flat that the housing association are doing nothing about. The dude said he will give them 28 days to effect repairs.

Well, it finally happened... After 4 appeals, my offer of repayment to my best mate, yeah right! has been accepted by the courts. God bless the bailliff for giving me advice. My other financial situation? Not going to file for bankruptcy, going for an Independant Voluntary Arrangement - less future repercussions than bankruptcy.

Love life is still on hold, I just don't seem to be meeting anybody who really does it for me. I met one of Stee's new girlfriends friend and she is attractive, 24 and has a boob job... she kept telling Kristina she was interested in me but heres the kicker... she is supposed to be seeing someone - a doorman no less!

Also found out that Stacie the schizo is pregnant...

Went to see Taking Back Sunday last Thursday. Fucking AWESOME gig. The 2 support bands, Hellogoodbye and Eisley were quite decent as well. As usual, it was full of Emo kids who thought it was humerous to throw coins and water at the stage. Eisley, although sounding good, weren't the kind of band that should have been supporting TBS... and it showed. The crowd never really got into them 'til the last song - shame really.



Going to Skegness for a couple of days tomorrow. It's a family trip... one that I wasn't invited to until a couple of weeks ago by my baby sister (baby sister, she is 5 years older than me!). All of my nieces and nephews kept asking me to go, was just my other brother and sister that never asked?!?

I feel good, I slept in my bed last night instead of on the couch. I hated having a king sized bed to myself... last night it was great - I spread out as much as I could and got a really good nights sleep.

Gym is going well, hockey is going very well.

' I, I always thought that I knew,
I'd always have the right to,
be living in the kingdom of the good and true.

And so on,
but now I think I was wrong.
And you were laughing along
and now I look a fool for thinking you were on my side.

Is it any wonder that I'm tired?
Is it any wonder that I feel uptight?
Is it any wonder I don't know what's right?

Sometimes,
It's hard to know where I stand.
It's hard to know where I am.
Well maybe it's a puzzle I don't understand.

Sometimes,
I get the feeling that I'm
stranded in the wrong time.
Where love is just a lyric in a children's rhyme, a soundbite.

Is it any wonder that I'm tired?
Is it any wonder that I feel uptight?
Is it any wonder I don't know what's right?

Oh these days,
after all the misery you made.
Is it any wonder that I feel afraid?
Is it any wonder that I feel betrayed?

Nothing left inside this old cathedral,
just the sad lonely spires.
How do you make it right?

Oh but you try.
Is it any wonder that I'm tired?
Is it any wonder that I feel uptight?
Is it any wonder I don't know what's right?

Oh these days.
After all the misery you made,
is it any wonder that I feel afraid?
Is it any wonder that I feel betrayed?'